Tuesday, December 08, 2009

POCKET MONSTERS ARE REALLY POCKET DEMONS...

It's only a matter of time before the children of Japan use their Satanic cuddly critter-fueled powers to destroy us all.


Thanks to 23 Wolves for the tape!

64 comments:

marahe said...

nothing good can come from anyone wearing a double breasted suit.

John said...

"Do not give your money to the Pokemon! Give it to us!"

And who knew D&D players were so prone to suicide? I would have never guessed that.

Anonymous said...

God bless America! Who is this man? Let's get him in the White House quick before the gays start marrying and unite against us!

TVarmy said...

1:25 is great. I love that couple. The wife really digs it, but the husband is stoically thinking "Not this shit again."

Fat 'n Boring said...

Evangelicals are always good for laffs. Yet I can't help but wonder what he was doing when he thought up this sermon?

Oh yeah. He was snorting blow off the bare ass of an underage Filipino rent boy. "Whay?"

Tyler Vincent said...

For all of the demonic power that surrounds the kids who are REALLY into Pokemon, they cannot keep their lunch money from being taken from them

scamps said...

A child's imagination is the work of the devil.

Paulo said...

It's hilarious but I feel bad for the kids subjected to that shit. In middle school in the early 90s I got so much grief from people who bought into this kind of stuff. I played D&D and kids who saw me carrying the books around wanted to beat me up for being "Satanic," and my 7th grade science teacher would make me bring my books to my locker if he saw them in his class. Pokemon was magnitudes more popular than D&D, so I wonder how this all played out for those kids.

Pizza Beer said...

"But they're so into this make-believe world they can't distinguish between fantasy and real"

Sounds a lot like Christianity.

Anonymous said...

There's an awful lot of George W. Bush's mannerisms in this guy.

Anonymous said...

Jigglypuff is a frightening demon.

Allison said...

eyebrows eyebrows eyebrows eyebrows

Grrg said...

I'm actually really interested in the turn this takes towards the ontological around 2:30: "Everything in life is real." I'm reminded of an interview Judith Butler gave once:

It struck me that she [Andrea Dworkin] wants to police not only representations but the ways people think, desire, and fantasize; she wants to obliterate the ethical distinctions between fantasy, representation, and action.

Okay so Butler was talking about the "Feminist Sex Wars" of the 70s and 80s, but her discomfort with a moral universe in which not only behavior and relationships, but also thoughts and feelings must be policed and controlled is, I think, similar to part of my reaction to this video. The part where I'm not giggling.

After all, we know that Everything In Life Is not Real, but rather TERRIBLE.

Anonymous said...

let me show you my pokemans . .

let me show you them . .

Anonymous said...

0:22 - "OM NOM NOM NOM NOM."

Anonymous said...

SOZ I HERD U LIKEZ MUDKIPZ!!

Anonymous said...

so basically when you're dead, you won't be in heaven, but spending eternity trying to "catch them all" because you were too busy playing with pocket monsters to listen to read the bible

Anonymous said...

"Pokemon was magnitudes more popular than D&D, so I wonder how this all played out for those kids."

Well I spent my life in Christian schools, so I experienced this firsthand. It wasn't nearly as bad for the Pokemon generation as it was for the D&D kids. They banned us from bringing the cards and games from school, but that was the most they could do. It actually went the other way around, the kids who didn't play were the ones getting crap (from their parents) because of course everybody wanted in on it.

Christopher said...

Somebody needs to tell this guy about the Megami Tensei series.

"Pokemon world is a world of the Satanic"

If we're talking about the cartoon show... yeah, I'll buy that.

Anonymous said...

And I used pokemon cards to help a kid learn to read once. Noooooo!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Wow, W's speaking gigs are looking too good.

23 Wolves said...

Tip of the hat...true gentlemens.

Marty said...

Kept waiting for him to knock that glass of (holy) water off the pulpit with all his ranting....woulda been funny, then he woulda blamed Pokemon for it.

Destination A Go-Go said...

So what your sayin' is....

Russian Roulette is a card game?



...See ya tomorrow night.

Anonymous said...

As a kid going to Catholic elementary school when this was huge and I was very into it, I never heard anything like this. Gameboys were banned before long because some kids were caught playing pokemon in class, but that was about it.

I'm just shocked he didn't bring up the banned episode that gave kids seizures in Japan, claiming that it was the work of Satan. Come on, that one was a softball.

Anonymous said...

ha ha ha this stuff is so funny

ilea said...

I'm going to Hell. Very nice of him to tell his audience that they might not be going to heaven??

Anyways, trying to remain unbiased after laughing my ass off I think he has something of a valid point with the fact that some gamers just dont connect to the world. However that is more lack of facing real life than THAT GOD DAMN DEMONIC POKEMON!!!!

rpgking7 said...

I laughed for like 4 minutes after watching this and hearing this bull. Yes everything these evangelical flimflam artists say is terrible.

GLMeece said...

Anybody recognize who this guy is? I'd like to look him up - I'd lay odds he's been defrocked or caught up in some scandal or another. Seriously, what did any of his diatribe have to do with "Christ died to save sinners" - this guy included?

J.R. Herbaugh said...

What you really have to look out for is Chinpokomon.

Anonymous said...

You know the worst thing? In the end they say they are christian! And people believe!

Anonymous said...

WOW. All I can say is this guy has wayyyy too much time on his hands... AND even though the overall message of this was funny, because it was so fkn STUPID, I have to say it really irritates me that he can stand so righteously and try to tell people they are NOT going to heaven??!! WTF???

Anonymous said...

i'm carrying monsters in my pocket. x'd
this is one of the people who escaped last month out of the Institute of Psychiatry plz put him back.

John Pieret said...

I think he's Phil Arms of Life Reach Ministries:

http://lifereachministries.com/

Radock said...

POKEMON ARE THE EVIL MINIONS OF SATAN SENT TO DESTROY OUR CHILDREN!

Anonymous said...

WHAT THE FUCK YOU MOTHER FUCKER?
POKEMON IS REALLY COOL SO SHUT UP YOU MOTHER FUCKER!

Anonymous said...

I remember first hand when my church preacher and Christian school teachers would say the following were Satanic at some point in time:

1. Pokemon
2. Harry Potter

It was ridiculous. They were just jealous of the popularity and revenue poured into these themes.

Anonymous said...

Thats why I only use Mewtwo and MissingNo....

Anonymous said...

this guy is retarted. he doesn't know anything. toys can't be "demonic" he should be set on fire by charizard. people like him annoy the crap out of me.

sweetsfromstrangers said...

common, you're suprised that jigglypuff is the anti christ?

Anonymous said...

SOO I HEEARD YOUU LIEK MUDKIPS...

YOUR GOING TOO HELL.

Anonymous said...

I already caught Arceus and he assured my ascent into heaven, kthxbye.

Scott said...

he's just mad because the monster in his pocket never came out of its pokeball

Anonymous said...

I have to know, was that shot of Jigglypuff edited to be with antichrist voice-over, or was it natural?

Honestly I'm slightly impressed this guy even know Pokemon was short for pocket monsters. I played the dang thing for two years before I caught on to that.

Anonymous said...

lol my sister is a hardcore Christian and she freaking LOL'd at this video like crazy!! XD That is really surprising... especially when SHE laughs at this message...

She even told me that NO WHERE in the Bible didn't have any points why Pokemon is bad... badges, evolution...come on...

Sadly those type of Christians make really ignorant thoughts...once something comes from Japan, it's automatically hated...JUST because Japan's religious views are different...

I also hate it when people say, "YOU ARE GOING TO HELL" right there and then...um... even they say just praying, reading the bible, going to church and so on...we still go to hell. Er... so...nothing can take us to Heaven? :/ okay...whatever...

BadIdeaSociety said...

The weird thing about this minister's point is that the first time I clicked into Pokemon as a college student I thought it was an update of Superbook. Even the original Pokemon theme smacks of the Christian-produced version of cool.

truteal said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bible_Black
this is what he should be condemning

Grenade said...

We must all be wary of murderous roving bands of D&D and pokemon players. They will burn you until your skin is a uniform shaded black, then steal all your points. every last one of them.

savages...

mavoorik said...

I watched the section with the edited why's in a row about 15 times

Anonymous said...

BS. just BS. hey, if the person on this vid or any1 who agrees wants an argument, meh youtube channel is SilverSerpentineX. if u agree that this A**hole is retarded, then SUBSCRIBE!!! POKEMON RULEZ!!! it shall never die!!!! XD

Anonymous said...

This man is an embarrassment to my profession, my religion, and all the members of whatever church he happens to sermonize in.

Invisible_Jester25 said...

Christians, we apologize for this asshole. He escaped from his padded cell again, and we've been trying to catch him so we can put him back for quite some time now...

Hope this guy ends up in a Hell full of demons disguised as Pokemon and D&D monsters. And I hope God allows those in Heaven to watch this moron's suffering as a TV show, because if it was a TV show I'd totally watch it. "Evangelists In Hell"! The new hit sitcom from ABC! Weeknights at 7:00 eastern/pacific!

Bryan|CoOL said...

Is monster=satan?

Aki Tanaka said...

OMG, so a Togepi with a pentagram on it forehead gonna crawl out of your kitchen sink cupboard and murder your family. OMG! You guys are so STOOPID!!!! You people are expecting way too much from a Japanese Anime Writer that has been in the business for years who he himself doesn't even have any relations to satanism. Open your EYES!!!

Anonymous said...

"It's only a game. Well Russian Roulette is only a game."

Does this mean Candyland is satanic too.

CJ Mick said...

Yeah guess what BUB! I, one christmas, asked God to get me Pokemon Diamond Version, not my mom or my family, and Christmas day i when into my stocking and i found a wrapped game case with a sticker that said, "From: Jesus To: CJ" I opened it and it was Pokemon Diamond Version and a DS was right behind it with the same sticker! So oh Buddy look on Bulbapedia before you judge a show or game by what you hear the first time look it up first! Bitch!

Anonymous said...

santan makes good things look bad or more speciphly he puts light in darknes sand darkness in light.

Anonymous said...

As someone who grew up as what can only be described a "hardcore Pokemon freak", I find this hilarious. Who knew that I'm now an instrument of Satan who can't distinguish between bits of loveable code on my GameBoy (or DSi) and real life? Uh... not me.

VASTECH said...

Most christians arent like this cult

VASTECH said...

I am christian and play pokemon. This guy suuuccckkks

VASTECH said...

Everything in televangelist occultic eyes is bad

VASTECH said...

The fact is this guy and his congregation isn't with christ

StevenTheAnimeNerd said...

Do I see the progenitor of Lord Ghetsis and Team Plasma here?

Anonymous said...

The man in this video is an idiot. He knows nothing about Pokemon. Kids blowing each other away? XD